The ‘F’ Word

The ‘F’ Word

Feelings! We don’t like to think about them, feel them, acknowledge them, and yet they remain, and at times completely take over our experience of ourself.

Some people go so far as to completely try to avoid them, resulting in high anxiety. Some default to anger in the hope of gaining some sense of safety from other distressing feelings. Some leave their bodies to ensure nothing is felt. Some people drink, take drugs to escape them. Yet the fact remains – we all have feelings!


What are Feelings?

Dr. Bryn Farnsworth describes feelings as the conscious experience of emotional reactions. While emotions are associated with bodily reactions that are activated through neurotransmitters and hormones released by the brain. Paul C Holinger M.D. outlines a range of definitions trying to capitulate the complexities of emotions including: Sensorimotor reflexive, Sensorimotor enactive, Preoperational, Concrete operational and Formal operational.

Much research has compared feelings with emotions and their differences, depending on emotional and cognitive development.

If you are not a neuroscientist or neuropsychologist and you are just wanting a quick definition, the bottomline is they are ‘electrical energy’ in the body. How they move, or get stuck in the body is the key to being a slave to them or being a master of them.

Mastering Feelings

What to do with feelings is the real mastery!

Firstly, the mind works vigilantly looking outwards for a way to get rid of these feelings, resulting in feelings being resisted, which in turn locks them in the body as energy, pain and anguish. We try to change our environment, the people around us, our mind etc, yet feelings remain. Literally what we resist persists!  Turning the mind inwards means there is no resistance to the feelings.


Try This For A Minute

Instead of turning your mind outwards to change people or places turn your mind inwards and surrender to the feeling. Now the trick is, you cannot ‘do’ surrender with the mind. This is definitely not the realm of the mind. The step the mind can do is simply turn inwards. Then for a moment let go into the feeling with your whole being. Stop and Drop into it. Surrender. Not with any particular outcome in mind, other than to let the feeling have you. No resistance. For one moment don’t pick up anything or move away from the feeling, let it overtake you. tricky for the mind as it thinks it will die at times. What happens then?

No resistance to energy means the energy simply flows through you. The ultimate alchemy of the soul! At times anxious can be transmuted into bliss simply by surrendering.

I know it sounds easy, but the mind always makes things more difficult. So without the story the mind tells you, simply directly experience the feeling….What happens?




Farnsworth, Bryn PhD., April 2020. How to Measure Emotions and Feelings (And the Difference Between Them)

Holinger, Paul C., M.D. March 2016, What Are Feelings? How are they related to drives or instincts?

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